How to Plan A Romantic Wedding When Eloping
Planning an Elopement Wedding
Eloping is when an engaged couple runs off and gets married without letting their family and friends in on the secret. Some couples are thrust into eloping when family conflicts make it impossible for them to have a peaceful ceremony in their hometown, while other couples wind up eloping after they realize all the energy which will be necessary to plan an elaborate wedding.
There are other couples who find that find the impulsivity behind eloping can be romantic and exciting. There are even stories of some couples who, on their first or second date, realize they are simply so smitten with each other that they run off and get married immediately.
In England there was a tradition for a lot of years of young couples eloping to Gretna Green in Scotland for their wedding when one of both sets of parents were objecting. Under Scottish law parental consent is not required and couples could have a legal wedding performed over an anvil by a blacksmith. There are plenty of stories abounding in history where inn owners on the road to Gretna Green made great efforts to slow down the parents to give the young couples a better chance of succeeding.
We will be adding a separate series of articles on Scottish Wedding Traditions shortly.
The reason why couples choose to elope for their wedding
Examine your reasoning for eloping. If you are knee-deep in planning your wedding and are feeling a little exhausted by the entire process and one day your fiancé looks at you and out of the blue says, “why don’t we just go get married right now?” you may be intrigued by the idea. After all, humans tend to flee from difficult situations, and planning a wedding and reception can certainly be considered a difficult situation.
There is also something to be said, though, for sticking with something to the very end, and you will probably find that following through on the wedding ceremony you have been planning for a long time will yield amazing results. You should really take a look at why the idea of eloping sounds like a brilliant idea to the both of you.
If you have yet to begin your planning and both just decide that running off and getting married would be the best scenario this is much more feasible than a couple who are two weeks away from an elaborately planned wedding which has cost thousands of dollars.
Are you going to hurt someone deeply by eloping?
You may think that eloping is an exciting and carefree way to tie the knot, but you really need to take a look at how your decision to elope will affect the people around you. Yes, the wedding is primarily about you and your future husband, but if you are even remotely close to your parents then you should realize that running off and getting married without inviting them is probably going to be awfully painful for them. This is doubly so when a more formal ceremony was already in the works and your parents were contributing both financially and emotionally to it.
You may not be able to understand how much this may hurt your family if you don’t have children of your own, but for now just think of it in these terms: if your parents were having a once-in-a-lifetime party and simply didn’t invite you, how would you feel about it? You would probably feel cheated, you might feel resentful, and you probably wouldn’t want to entertain conversation about this fabulous party later on with your parents.
This isn’t to say that elopement is a horrible idea in every circumstance, indeed there are some instances where eloping can make a lot of sense. Just try to look at who will be affected by your decision and base your decision regarding eloping on the feelings of the people you are close to.
Avoid the get-married-but-don’t-tell-anyone situation.
There are some couples who have valid reasons to get married earlier than later. For some people there are financial benefits to getting hitched, such as health insurance benefits which would otherwise be unavailable to a significant other. Some military couples find themselves facing an impending deployment and feel the need to part as a married couple instead of as a dating couple. Then there are those couples who just feel an insatiable desire to tie the knot as soon as possible, even if an elaborate romantic wedding is already in the works.
You might find, though, that getting married in a secret ceremony prior to the scheduled wedding ceremony takes place and then not telling your friends and family might not only cheapen the experience of the scheduled ceremony but also hurt a lot of people’s feelings. Imagine being a mother and helping your child plan a dream wedding only to discover that your child ran off and already got married without so much as a familiar witness attending.
This situation is wrought with the potential for heartbreak and bad feelings. If the time comes when you feel as though you simply must get married immediately and cannot wait another minute then you should let everyone else in on your intentions. Cancel the elaborate ceremony and keep the reception date for a post-marriage celebration.
See our other articles on eloping to specific places such as Las Vegas.
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Planning a Romantic Wedding
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