There are a lot of commercial pressures on couples to spend a lot of money on romantic dinners and gifts on St Valentine’s Day. But earlier this year I was challenged by BBC Radio Scotland to draw up an inexpensive romantic gift and dinner plan for men who needed help to be more romantic. This article is a version of that BBC broadcast. However it can be used for any special romantic occasion just change the date!

First of all any romantic gift needs to be personal in some aspect. This means NOT the first box of chocs you have found on a shelf at local supermarket and a bunch of flowers from just inside the store doorway — although for some people this could be a better option rather than dying young for not having bought her anything.

Start to prepare early for the big day.

Go down to a stationery store and buy a pad of Post It Notes preferably with a small heart or kisses on them. If you can’t find them preprinted you could always draw them on yourself with a fine red felt tip pen. Write some different words of endearment on each note. It could a short love poem or love quote or simply saying "I love You".

1. Leave that note where your partner is going to see it early on the special day. For example attach it to her bedside alarm clock or somewhere she will see when she first wakes up.
2. Place another on her bathroom mirror saying something different but of a loving nature
3. In her make-up bag
4. In her shoes
5. In coat pocket
6. In handbag
7. In briefcase
8. On car dashboard

You get the idea! Place them anywhere where she is bound to find them and smile at the thought of what it says. One variation of this theme would be to build up a little mystery with each note giving little clues to the fact you are planning something really special later in the day. Example "if you are reading this note just imagine what you could be reading later in the day"

There is one large chain of High Street Chemists advertising at the moment "it is the gift not just the thought". They are trying to get you to spend money with them. But would you be thinking of your lover a lot more if you were being totally reminded of their love throughout the day by finding these love notes or would you prefer to be just un-wrapping another electric toothbrush.

Dont leave it there now she is at work.

Continue to remind her all day while she is at work!

1. Post her a personal love letter at work clearly marked "confidential and personal" of course, even clearly marked with big red lips on envelope.
2. Have a small bunch of flowers delivered to them at office during the morning. I once sent the same person three bunches all delivered by different florists all at different times. Imagine the words going through her head "What on earth is going to happen next?"
3. Leave a note inside their lunchbox and continue all day in the same vein.
4. If she always parks her car in the same place each day leave some helium heart shaped balloons inside it so she finds them on her return.

Each of the notes to be suggesting "something special" is going to happen because she is "something special" to you. Leave it in the air as to what will happen next.

Now about that inexpensive but very romantic meal I promised.

Thankfully at this late stage it is probably too late to book a table at a good quality restaurant. So go one step even better and probably cheaper as well.

Your romantic St Valentine Day dinner needs to be prepared well in advance

You will need a number of candles some colored ones for around the room and two long more elegant ones for the dining table. Don’t forget to buy some matches!

Some romantic ballad CDs — don’t worry about cost of buying these after all you will both want to re-live this evening many times over the next year. It cuts the cost right down to mere pennies per session.

A good quality wine is helpful chill it in advance.

Get rid of all potential distractions after all this is a night for two people. So find someone to take the kids away for a sleep over. Do a swap with a friend you can trust and say you will do it for them some other time. If you are having to ask a couple I would suggest that you approach the wife not the husband she is probably going to be so jealous she will say YES on one condition that she is the one who finds out first how it all went.

Don’t plan a heavy meal. Cook something light instead. Who wants to be so overful you both just collapse on the couch and fall asleep straight afterwards.

 Maybe with each course add something colored red (use food coloring if necessary) to brighten the meal and keep the connection with the red of romance.

 Switch off the phone if possible to avoid distractions in middle of meal.

Light the candles before your partner comes home and put on some of that new music to smooth the atmosphere before she comes in.

Fellas get dressed up have a close shave and use some aftershave you know she likes. You are going to get close enough for her to smell that scent tonight.

Take your time to eat reach out and hold her hand and say something like "I love you" but make sure you mean it.

Try something really light for desert such as different flavours of ice-cream and whipped cream and two long spoons to share. You probably did it when courting — why not do it again you are never too old to do something romantic.

After the meal suggest a slow dance in each others arms and smooch all you want.   But it is before the nine o clock watershed so let us stop there.

What about next time?

Finally though plan to do something special again — within the month — and this time give it even more thought about how you build up the suspense and attraction. She will be looking forward to it!

Have you thought about an indoor picnic event put a travel rug on living room along with cushions and some sandwiches and pop or bubbly drink like champagne. Get some plastic sheeting and put some sand on them along with bucket and spade and sea-shells. Choose the music to suit the atmosphere South Seas steel guitar or beach boys can be fun.

Dress up in teddy boy outfits and play Bill Haley records.

You are limited only by your own imagination. Live out the dream.

Zig Ziglar says ‘if you always do things the way you have always done them, then you always will get what you have always got’

Ron Thomson says you need to rekindle that romance and regularly do something extra-ordinary if you want an extra-ordinary romantic relationship.