Lovemaking and Intimacy Within A Romantic Relationship

Help for a sexless Marriage

Believe it or not 17 million married people in the USA are in this position according to one study. 

Following another nationwide study Newsweek magazine published a cover story in their June 30th 2003 edition entitled

"We’re Not In the Mood: For married couples with kids and busy jobs, sex just isn’t what it used to be. How stress causes strife in the bedroom – and beyond."

Its author Kathleen Deveny went on to write, “It’s difficult to say exactly how many of the 113 million married Americans are too exhausted or too grumpy to get it on, but some psychologists estimate that 15 to 20 percent of couples have sex no more than 10 times a year which is how the experts define sexless marriage.”

Kathleen Deveny put it too simple for my liking by suggesting there are only two reasons why this situation occurs within a marriage. It is far more complicated than that.

Some couples have been known to make a vow of celibacy for life of the marriage or just for a period of time during the relationship. The problem with the latter is resuming “normal sexual relationships” again afterwards can be difficult and can lead to reduced frequency in the very long term.

Complaints about low desire are the #1 problem brought to sex therapists. And if you’ve been thinking that low sexual desire is only “a woman’s thing,” think again. Many sex therapists believe that low sexual desire in men is America’s best-kept secret. (see The Sex-Starved Marriage by Michele Weiner Davis)

For some couples within a sexless marriage the stress resulting from that situation becomes unbearable and can lead to an affair outside the marriage relationship. Even where an affair does not happen as a result it can be a symptom of something wrong deeper within the relationship. Sometimes it maybe just lack of time and energy due to doing too many other activities. It may be one partner has upset the other by having an affair and can’t forgive or forget the hurt the memory causes them. For others it may be just lack of romance.

Is there any hope for someone stuck in that sexless relationship?

If you are one of those 113 million married people living in the USA and wanting to make that number decrease by two (you and your spouse) YOU CAN improve the sexual relationship you are in. However one of the first tasks is to discover how you got into the situation.

Will we be able to solve our sexless marriage problem?

There are no guarantees on this and you will NOT know whether you can fix the problem of until you have started to try to repair it. There are so many complex reasons but working through the following five groups will help identify the cause and give you a route to finding the solution.

One of the world’s leading experts on the issue (Dr. Andrew D. Atwood) with over twenty years experience in the field breaks down the root causes (and solutions of course) into just five areas of investigation and eight main solutions. If he can’t help you map out the solution there is no one who can.

Quite frankly from speaking to people myself and reading emails I have received since starting this website over four years ago I have been close to tears when I have read the heartbreaking stories people have written. Yet I have also been encouraged by success stories of people who have dedicated themselves to working on their marriage relationship.

Andrew has designed am intensive course to help people who want to help themselves but he has also written a free report which you can get here http://BeRomantic.com/solutions  Seriously if you are looking for an answer and you would not have read this far if your weren't — try his advice.

Think about it you have nothing to lose but you could have your marriage relationship to gain.

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